Creating a Life: The Memoir of a Writer and Mom in the Making

Some books are pure pleasure, an escape, and others give us more to ponder. Some books allow us to reach down deep to the hidden place of our most private thoughts. Creating a Life is the latter kind.

Creating a Life is not just a memoir about giving birth to both a child and a life; it is a stunning tribute to the audacity it takes to reclaim one’s self. Corbin Lewars has given a voice to each and every woman who has experienced sexual abuse. One out of four girls has suffered childhood sexual abuse, a statistic provided in the introduction to warn the reader of the immensity of the author’s story.

In the beginning of the book, Lewars is honest about her obsession with having a baby. But her husband Jason is still deciding whether he wants a baby or not. In an attempt to satisfy her whirling emotions, she decides to get a Master’s degree while also remodeling her house. Her efforts do not quench her needs, and the reader is given glimpse after glimpse into her personal hell.

Jason finally agrees to procreate, and Lewars goes full steam into conception. The couple becomes pregnant in no time, only to lose the baby in the first trimester. Lewars enters an intense mourning period. Every memorable book has an instance when the reader experiences a point of light, and it was here that I began to engage with the author’s "real" story.

Lewars remembers a rape that occurred when she was twelve, a rape she had repressed since it happened. She comes to realize much of her dissatisfaction with her life is a byproduct of this denial. The memory of the rape sends her into therapy, where she promises to resolve her own issues before becoming a mother. With this clear plan, Lewars sets about fulfilling her quest to become whole. But the best made plans can change. She becomes pregnant again.

Creating a Life is one of the most exquisite and brave memoirs I have read in years. The message of hope and dedication is universal and steps outside the confines of the story itself, reaching women of all ages. As a writer, woman, and mother, I’m humbled by this beautiful, courageous book. Many life lessons are here for the learning.

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